November. A prelude to the holiday season. I am, without a doubt, one of those annoying "lets skip right to Christmas" people. Ugh, I know. I think I annoy myself sometimes. I have to make a concerted effort to be less annoying about it all. But I just. cannot. help. myself! The twinkly lights, the music, the warm cups of somethings, the family, the snow, the reflection of the year, the dwelling on just what it is that Christmas means to me.
And you know what? It means love. It means togetherness. It means the miraculous. It means F-O-R-G-I-V-E-N-E-S-S. Yup, just dropped the F-bomb, folks. And I have to say, I didn't want to. The Lord had been speaking to me about touching on this in my writing. He had brought up memories, traumas, scenes reeling back with words that haunt. And all of the above. You see, this year He has been speaking to me about this in my own life. Sharing with me that the level that I forgive others is equivalent to my level of understanding in what I have been forgiven of. Did you hear that right? My ability to forgive = my understanding of what God died for on the cross. Now, I am not saying in any way/shape/form that what happened to you isn't awful. It could even be horrible. And it could've happened over and over again. And it could still be happening. Whatever you are going through, your need to forgive does not negate the level of wretched behavior of said person(s). BUT, God's word is very clear. And God's perfect example of forgiveness is the platform on which He lovingly commands us to do this.
Lets take a moment to acknowledge exactly WHAT God says in the bible on this:
"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, if my brother (insert individual who wronged you) keeps on sinning against me, how many times do I have to forgive him? Seven times? 'No, not seven times,' answered Jesus, 'but seventy times seven (insert number of times individual has wronged you)...'"
Matthew 18.21-22 GNTD
"And when you stand and pray, forgive anything you may have against anyone (insert individual who wronged you), so that your Father in heaven will forgive the wrongs you (insert your name here) have done."
Mark 11.25 GNTD
I know what you are thinking. Easier said than done, huh? "You don't understand...so and so doesn't even care or acknowledge that what they did was wrong...they don't care." This all may be true. But God's word doesn't change based on circumstance. He is consistent across the board. Now, this doesn't mean there is no mercy or grace in traumatic situations. I often have to wake up in the morning at times and give an offense to The Lord, over and over again. Sometimes, the memory still hurts. Sometimes, I have to make a choice over and over again in my heart to relinquish my right to punish the person through bitterness. Because honestly, the only person I am punishing when I choose to hold a grudge is myself. To bottle that up inside of myself is 100% toxic. Let it go. And let The Lord saturate the memory. Erase it even. It is a beautiful thing to give a gift to someone when they don't deserve it. Much like what God did for us on the cross.
How do we know if we have forgiven someone? Well, I am so glad you asked;) I have walked through many situations and experiences in which I have had to practice forgiving. I mean, my parents were Pastors (and still are) growing up. I saw lots in the church and things that people did to my parents or said about my imperfect family that were hard to get past. Please understand, I am coming from a place of having "been there". My intent in this is not to be bossy but to draw attention to a tabooed subject. To bring to light something that people are allowing to consume so much of their mind/will/emotions & life. I would say I knew I had fully let something go when I could talk to and converse with someone without thinking of the offense. I know I have forgiven them if I can wholeheartedly wish them well in what they do. I know I have forgiven them when I can carry on as usual. When I don't avoid the person (this is my default). Only then, I know that my heart is in the right place. And folks, to have your heart right with God is priceless. It brings so much freedom, so much peace. So from one imperfect person to another, can I ask you a question? What have you been hiding in your heart that you are ready to set free? Give it to Him. His love never fails. He makes beauty out of ashes.
"When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, “Do you want to be made well?"
John 5:6
Forever growing & learning with you,
Shelli
XO
