Absolute certainty. A term that I would use to describe my feelings in only a few moments of my life-the times in which I had no doubt about the choice I was making. The first that comes to mind is the day I accepted Christ into my heart. The second is the day I married Luke. Now obviously, I have had a lot of time to make choices between then and now with which I had no doubt. But I am talking about a never-looking-back-I-have-no-doubts-I-know-in-my-heart-this-is-real-kind-of-certainty. You see, I have always been a skeptic. I don't take things for face value. I research. I crave knowledge, seek counsel and glean from others experiences. To the point that I often neglect my own internal God-given compass. The one that points you North at times, when facts (and logic) say to head South. I am talking about The Holy Spirit. He has always been a very real part of my life, speaking to me through dreams, visions, or as my internal dialogue takes a sudden u-turn. These moments are invaluable. And they can change the course of a life when it might not make sense to others.
I met with a dear friend a few weeks ago and we discussed the topic of faith. I recalled a time when I was in middle school when my Dad decided to leave his successful career of 20 years in hardwood flooring to go into ministry. He had co-owned a company at the time, and was killing it at his trade. During his career, he had worked in homes such as Bill Gates & Paul Allen-you get the picture. There was much at stake. He laid it all down to pursue the call on his life. Now you have to understand-my Dad used to be the guy that would avoid getting in front of any size of crowd, to the point of leaving his Bible at home to avoid having to read or getting called on. He was comfortable where he was at. I recall this being a fundamental part of my own faith & walk with God-through my Father's radical obedience. Through his yielding to The Lord. To try and explain what that did inside of me, a 6th grader, would be for a whole different blog post. Possibly a few. I have since had the privilege of watching hundreds, if not thousands, of lives impacted by his obedience to what The Lord asked him to do. Through the submission of his own will. This was another one of those moments of "absolute certainty". Through my Father's sacrifice, I was able to see more clearly about the importance of going back to my own internal compass when making decisions (The Holy Spirit). Because what he chose to do didn't make sense on paper. But let me tell you, the peace and obvious blessing it brought to all of us is indescribable. I honor my dad for his choice (& my mom for supporting his decision). What a beautiful sacrifice. Honestly, what a beautiful picture of what God would do for us. Oh wait, he kind of died for us, sooo....;)
(My mom & dad pictured above)
It is because of these specific actions that I often stop to ask myself, "What would I be willing to give up to pursue God's plan for my life?" "In a world full of self-focus & "self-care", am I willing to lay what I want down, even amidst my own struggles, to yield to what my CREATOR would want instead?" It might be hard. Maybe even embarrassing. But faith is not meant to be glamorous. This might look completely different to others, too. The point is that no matter what sacrifice or radical obedience that a person feels led to pursue, who knows what other doors will and need to be opened as a result?! Now don't get me wrong, this is not a means to justify your foolish choice. Or your rebellion. But rather, ones biblically aligned choice to put faith in action.
John 15:4-5 says, "Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." Whew! I was struck by that last part- "...apart from me you can do nothing." Because we can do a lot of wonderful, responsible and successful things. BUT, what that passage is saying is that unless you remain in Him, YOUR choices will not hold the weight that they could. Something to chew on. No matter what denomination, gender, background you come from. Also, I felt like the part of this verse where He talks about how no branch can bear fruit by itself stood out. As much as He makes clear that HE is the vine and we are the branches, the vine is also connected to other vines. I think He was trying to make two points here-that we are to stay close to HIM but also we are meant to be connected to others on that same tree. That is how the gospel can be most effective & pure. That is one piece so many people miss. My heart aches for a unified body of Christ.
Can I be really honest? My actions don't always look like this. They are often very calculated. I am human, and I know the fear of looking foolish. I know that I desire consistency and having "a plan". I know those feelings all too well. But if I can shed light on this, and we can self-reflect corporately, we can do this together! (Remember-"no branch can bear fruit by itself"). So I challenge you, loved ones, that you ask yourself this question today: "What is it that I need to lay down or change to pursue what God has for me in this life?" Please, feel free to reach out and chat. We could even get coffee. I want to take that step with you, so lets do it together friends.
All my love and support,
Shelli
